Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

By skipping offseason workouts, Lamar Jackson forfeits another $750,000 - NBC Sports

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

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I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

What is the reason for the high rate of unmarried individuals in America, particularly among males?

I actually pay taxes

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Steelers Address Mason Rudolph Trump Rally Appearance In Email To Fans - TMZ

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I can count

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Why is my older sister so mean to me as if I was her enemy?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

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I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Joe Biden is not the best president we had. That would be John F. Kennedy. How is voting for Donald Trump any worse than voting for Joe Biden?

I see through liars

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I told my 13-year-old daughter that she should never start a fight, but has my permission to end it. She got suspended for ending a fight that some other girl picked with her by hitting her then retreating. How do I handle the school’s response?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

How do you like to be pegged?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

How is TikTok able to censor porn?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

What are the possible reasons for people feeling depressed after the holiday season? Why does being alone exacerbate these feelings?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Chris Hughes Posts Video With JoJo Siwa From Game Night With Her Parents - TODAY.com

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

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I can read

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

How did a computer scientist such as Geoffrey Hinton manage to win a Nobel Prize in physics when computer science already has its own Nobel Prize equivalent in the Turing Awards?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for traitorism